I recently took the Biblioholism test that Robin shared at her blog “Heart of Wisdom”.
From the get-go I figured this was a test I would fail. I mean just look at the definition of a biblioholic – a person who longs to purchase, read, store, admire and consume books in excess. Not much hope for me huh?
Well here it goes…
- When you go to a bookstore with a friend, are you usually carrying more books when you leave than your friend is? Not necessarily. Depends on the friends. Depends on the store. I tend to purchase online rather than bookstores as Australian stores are woefully understocked and overpriced. But if you looked at my weekly or monthly total I’m sure I’d win hands down. So does that mean I score as a “yes’ or a “no”? Let’s say “depends” is half a yes.
- Do you wake up the morning after, unable to remember how many books you bought or how much you spent on them? I’ll have to answer yes on this one. I’ll definitely forget the price. Who remembers prices?! And I may forget how many and which books as I umm and ahh for so long putting books in and out of the cart and back and forth from the cart to the wishlist. In the end it’s hard to remember what I ended up purchasing.
- Do you, inexplicably, yank down a volume from the store shelves, open it, and shove your nose deeply into the binding, hungrily inhaling the ink and paper smells? No I can’t say that I do. Books usually mean dust. It wouldn’t be smart to shove your nose too deeply in one.
- Have you ever bought the same book twice without knowing it? Okay, this is a no brainer. And I’ll probably have to score myself with a double yes. On more than one occasion I have bought more than TWO copies of the same book. In fact I’d hate to hazard a guess at the number of times this has happened which is why I’m working (sporadically) on my LibraryThing list. My friends and family don’t complain though as I just pass the extras on to them. If it was good enough for me to buy several times than it’s nice to be able to share a book I loved.
- When you go to a bookstore after work, thus arriving home late at night, do you lie about where you have been, telling your spouse you were at a bar? That wouldn’t work at all so no. My hubby knows me well. For one I don’t drink and for two my hubby knows that I can’t resist a bookstore. However I have been known to twist things the other way. I’ll suggest a venue for something based solely on the fact that I know a bookstore is nearby and I might get a chance to visit.
- At Christmastime, do you buy your loved ones books that you want to read? Hmmm probably not. What I like is definitely not what other people would like.
- Have you ever given up on a book before you started it? Oh definitely. Why suffer through a bad book when there are sooooo many great ones waiting to be discovered and read.
- Are you unable to walk through a mall without stopping at a bookstore? I’ll probably have to say yes to this one. I judge a good shopping centre based on the number of bookstores they have. Mind you I am becoming more discerning in my old age. I tell myself that it’s okay to skip a bookstore as there is better stuff online.
- Do you have a personal library on an entire subject, none of which you have read? Hmmm I would have to say no. Why would I buy it if I have not intention of reading it. I don’t buy books for the sole purpose of decorating the house even if they do look stunning on the shelves.
- Do you ever buy books simply because they were on sale? Ummm yes *hanging head in shame* but rarely are they real bargains… only occasionally.
- Have you ever bought a book because you liked the cover design? I may pick it up based on the cover but it would need to have more value than that to earn a place on my shelves. I’m running out of space you know so each book is judged critically to determine its worthiness.
- When at a garage sale, is the first thing you look at the books? Ummm if I went to garage sales it would definitely be the most important thing to check out. That counts as only half a yes I suppose.
- Have you ever been fired from a job, or reprimanded, for reading? Never. I don’t like getting in trouble.
- Have you and your immediate family ever discussed your book-buying and reading habits? Jokingly yes but never seriously. I’m a good girl. I don’t need intervention…really I don’t.
- When you watch TV, do you always have a book in your lap for slow parts and commercials? At times yes. Hey, I always like to have a pile of books handy no matter what activity I’m doing.
- Do you watch television sports with the sound off? No because I don’t waste valuable hours watching sports!!
- Does panic set in when you find yourself in a barbers chair or under a hairdryer with nothing to read? If I knew I was going to these places I would definitely have bought a book with me. But why waste time with hairdressers. Grow your hair long like mine and stay home and enjoy your book properly!
- Have you ever become suddenly deeply interested in an obscure topic and immediately bought six or more books on that topic? Hmmm I probably have. With homeschooling we find ourselves wanting to learn about all sorts of things we wouldn’t have read about otherwise.
- Do you ever lie about how many books youve bought? Don’t ask me and I won’t have to lie!! Evasion is not lying is it? Divert the question by telling them about your amazing finds. See there are lots of options without having to lie.
- Do you devise grand and devious strategies for getting your books in the house to avoid the scrutiny of your spouse or family? I do joke about it but no I don’t. I think biblioholics get to a point where there is no point in hiding the obvious. If you leave the house you are going to come home with another book or ten.
- Has your book buying ever embarrassed your family or friends? I don’t think so. Too bad if it does. Hey I’m the first person they call if they need a book on any topic!!
- When a stranger walks into your house or apartment, are his or her first words usually a comment about your books? Without a doubt. I have a floor to ceiling shelf right in the front hallway so they can’t help but comment. A few steps into the next room and there is another gigantic shelf in front of them and to their right in the study. There are books everywhere in this house and I love it that way.
- If someone asks you for a reading list of the twenty most influential books youve ever read, do you happen to have such a list on your person? No, can’t say that I do.
- Do you have at least six books next to your bed? Oh yes more than 6….sheepishly avoiding the question… I counted and there are currently 27 stacked in one tall pile beside my bed waiting to fall on me in the night. But what a way to go!! And no I’m not going to count the ones on the floor beside the bed or in the top drawer of the bedside table!!!
- When a bookstore clerk has been unable to locate a certain book in the stacks, have you ever been able to find that book? Oh gosh who bothers asking store girls. They know nothing about books. I often cringe at the book suggestions they make to unsuspecting customers and I have been known to step in and make my own suggestion. I suppose that’s another yes for me then.
Okay so how many “yes” responses do I have….hmmm….TWELVE according to my count.
- More than four Yes answers: you are looking down into the deep and woeful pit of biblioholism!
- More than eight Yes answers: you are hanging by your fingernails on the edge of the chasm of biblioholism!
- More than twelve Yes answers: its just a matter of time before you finish falling into the dusty canyon of biblioholism!
Too late for me it seems. I’m a confirmed biblioholic!!
What a wonderful condition to have. I wouldn’t have it any other way!!
Okay, must sign off…it’s been hours since my last book purchase. I might just wander over and see what’s waiting to be found at Amazon.